Monday

First Major Surgery

Sorry.

I haven't been on this for a long time. Again. Maybe I was busy, Or I didn't have anything to write about.

But a few weeks ago pain flared up on the right side of my tummy. Just under the ribs. It happened before. Many times. I thought it was just a stitch that you feel when you work hard. But it became more frequent and intensified. I was diagnosed with gall stones. Serves me right of eating a lot of good food. By 'good' meaning food that is delicious, tasty. Sinful. Savory. Sweet.

So the doctor says 'We have to remove it'.

Me: ?
Doctor: your gall bladder
Me: Will I die?
Doctor: (smiles) Not yet. But that pain is because the gall stones are blocking something that helps you digest, and the gall bladder is swelling because of the resistance.

So I checked myself into the hospital Monday last week. My daughter keeping company.

Now I don't like hospitals. More so if I have to go under for what my doctor calls 'Major Surgery'.

Monday night I was already scared. Yes. A middle aged man deathly afraid of going under the knife. I had tubes and sensors attached between me and a beeping machine.

Tuesday morning, a nurse gently wakes me up saying it's time. So I got up to go to the bathroom, cables and tubes attached, to take a sanitizing bath with what the hospital provided as a sanitizing bath kit. The cold room felt colder. My daughter was still asleep. So I consoled myself and alleviated my fears a little by telling myself she will be there waiting for me after the procedure. Gave her a little kiss, got back into my bed and told the nurse I'm ready.

I was wheeled out of the room and we made our way through corridors, doorways and elevators, with each second bringing me closer to a heightened level of fear. That whole time I prayed. I prayed that everything would go well. That this is a milestone in my life. That I will see my daughter when I get back to my room. That my life partner will be there too.

Arriving at the operating theater, I was transferred to the operating table, and more cables and sensors attached to me. All the doctors in the room assured me that everything will be fine. I just nodded. I was afraid my voice would break from the fear and the shaking. I could hear the heart monitor beeping incessantly, indicating that it was beating faster than normal.

Doctors finally explained to me what will happen in the next few hours. In detail. What is to be done. What to expect. It didn't help me relax. It was the general anesthesia  that did.

I woke up around 3 in the afternoon, my belly button screaming 8 in pain. Nurse gives more pain killers. I don't know how much time passed. I could only remember saying '7'; '5'; '4'. Then the nurse said thats good. We'll get it down to 3. That must have happened because next thing I knew I woke up in my room. With my daughter. And later in the evening with my life partner. My tummy was sore. I couldn't sit up very well. it was painful.

I saw the stones that have been plaguing for what must be many years, considering the size of these crystals sat in a plastic medical cup. I stared at it. For a few minutes. Then at dinner.

Checked out of the hospital next morning. Still sore. But can walk.

Today I got back to work. pulled off the bandage from my belly button. Ew. Dried blood.

I got through it. Now I have to watch what I eat for the next few weeks. And live my life as if it was my last day on Earth.

Pray for me.