Snow was falling on that cold November morning. It probably has been snowing since the night before, as a soft blanket of white has rendered additional color to an otherwise depressing gray facade that is Cathedral Street in Glasgow. The cab stood by, it’s exhaust plumes the only movement discernable if one were to chance upon this scene. They stood there in silence, not knowing what to do next, in spite of what will be from then on. The bags were already in the trunk, and he stood still in the falling snow, figuring out what to say. He wore a black heavy coat over the one purchase he made during the weekend in the Scottish city, a woven wool pullover. It kept him warm, but it did not make him feel whole. Facing him, she was also in a warm overcoat, keeping her hands in the pockets. An observer would have described this moment as surreal, the two a strong contrast to the winter shade, his black hair muddled with snowflakes, and her golden tresses flailing wistfully in the light cold wind.
They stared at each other for what seemed like eternity, finding the reason for being there. As one from experience could tell, the good things usually never last long enough. His eyes looked into hers, the only true color that made the monochromatic landscape more interesting, at least on her. Blue. I will never forget that color, he thought. And then, at thirty one past six on that cold Monday morning, he knew. Her eyes misted, then a single tear drop formed, and travelled slowly down her left cheek. He reached out with his right hand, ungloved despite the cold, and gently wiped the tear off with his thumb. And yet his hand remained, feeling her soft cheek, and the familiar twinkle in her eye whenever he touches her. She liked the firm affection, because nobody has held her that way before. “Alexandra, I just want to know.” He said. “I just want to know…”
“Oh, John,” she replied. “You know I did. You know I do”
He reached over, and kissed her forehead. She felt his warm lips, and wondered fleetingly if she should let this happen. Then her nose, then her lips were locked with his, feeling every moment. Their arms wrapped tightly around each other. She smelled wonderful, he thought, even at this ungodly hour. She felt safe, secure, away from the all that is harsh that moment. Alexandra did not want to let go. She just wanted to be wrapped in him.
And the moment has passed. They looked into each others’ eyes once more, and knew it was time. The world was slowly turning again, and they needed to get on. John held her hands, and it was as it always has been. But not no more. Her eyes are still misty. But she could not take back what has already been said. She knew if that were she to turn around and regret the decision, it would be different, and unfair for both of them.
With a slight motion, John made it clear to the driver just a few moments more were needed.
“I will always love you, hon” John said with that same low voice she knew to be his true self. Staring into her eyes, he ran his hand slowly through her hair.
She stared at him, this man that made her life a little more colorful the past few months. As he was turning away, she held his hand for just a moment longer. Then she let go. After shutting the door, he looked back as the cab drove away, away from her. .
And she whispered into the winter “I love you, too”
And they both thought, at that same exact moment, where did it all go wrong?
Turn back the clock six months…
